Hi; my name’s Mary Beth Hall, and I’m the KIC/TIC manager at BCSS. The wealth of knowledge and stories of severe and persistent mental illnesses are vast on our BCSS sites, in my community and in the connections I have made thus far, both personally and professionally. I’ve learned so much in the past three years in my role as youth manager.
In my early days as the youth manager, I naively thought all mental illnesses were on the same level as the obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) I struggle with, which often is controlled with simple things: diet, exercise and mindfulness. I’m currently on a low-dose antidepressant and probably will be for the rest of my life. There were times I tried to come off them, but every time I was VERY uncomfortable. So I think of it as just a bit of grease that keeps the wheels running in my mind. Without it, the ride is a little bumpy.
So far, I’ve learned that without a proper treatment plan that involves medication, a person with a severe and persistent mental illness can have their life totally flipped upside down. No amount of yoga and good vibes can cure psychosis.
Living with psychosis can be challenging. And when the person in psychosis is a parent with small children, managing it is that much harder. I can relate to it on some level. I have two small children, and I feel guilty on the days when my OCD interferes with being the parent I want to be.
I cannot imagine how some parents must feel when they have to leave their children to go into hospital or they can’t take care of their kids because of their sickness. Some of our kids in BCSS’s Kids, Tweens and Teens in Control programs also care for their parent or younger siblings when their parent is ill.
This is what drives me. With BCSS’s Kids, Tweens and Teens in Control programs, we CAN help parents with severe and persistent mental illness by helping their children be the strongest version of themselves. Some of the things that our programming teaches are mindfulness, maintaining boundaries and self-care.
I believe if we’re able to equip healthy kids with tools to help them reach out to safe adults for help and educate them about the early signs of mental illnesses, we’ll be able to lessen the blow that emerging adults face due to mental illness in their family. When we provide kids with a deep understanding and knowledge of severe and persistent mental illnesses, it reduces the fear they may feel when something unpredictable happens. The most important part is to teach kids to know themselves well and act with kindness and empathy when they do have to care for a parent with a mental illness.
Something that goes a long way is talking about mental illnesses the same way we talk about physical illnesses. I can speak from experience, because in my own family practicing this has been beneficial in destigmatizing mental health issues. I now encourage my kids to talk freely about mental health. “What’s it FEEL like to have OCD, Momma?” my nine-year-old asked me one day. “Sometimes, the wheel in my mind gets stuck, so I have to take a moment to get it going again with deep breathing, reflection and taking care of myself,” I said. My hope is that one day, mental health will be integrated and be a routine part of overall health check-ups for every Canadian, starting in early childhood.